Today’s post is about boundaries. Yes boundaries. I know weird, right? Well I have learned a lot about a shit load of things in the last little while and boundaries come up for me when I think of these very cool chicks I know. When it comes to lending ahand, these ladies don’t seem to have any boundaries. I think they would literally give you the shirts off their backs to keep you warm.
I think about the boundaries or lack thereof that I have had in life. And the backbone I feel that I am just finding. I have not said so many things in fear of upsetting people, literally just to upset someone anyways. I have allowed things to go on that I don’t want to because I want to be the cool chick that never bitches. Stuffed so many emotions so deeply inside I ate just to quiet my mind. And here Iam feeling. Wow. Ow.
What I have learned (and it may seem obvious) is that you need to say the thing. Good, bad, Ugly…. the more you stuff your words the more you drink, or smoke or self destruct. I have said what I have needed to say lately, in a way that is not pushing my opinion or telling someone to change or bitching or even nagging. I have chosen what I can no longer be quiet about…. and guess what? The world isn’t as fragile as I thought it was, and neither am I. I have said the thing and people have listened. AND are still talking to me. No one has gotten mad or stormed off or told me to fuck off (oh wait, maybe they have), but it’s ok. I didn’t die or melt or cry. And I got it out. And like they say, if someone didn’t like what I had to say, that would be too bad.
What I have struggled with is the fact that boundaries need to be reinforced. They are an interesting force that need to be tended to daily. Without constant reinforcement, being boundaries are literally words just coming out of your mouth. This is where we often fail as adults. We feel bad, we break down our wall, we let someone do something we said we wouldn’t. And there you are, back to the way things were. Tolerating. What are you tolerating? Me I am over toleration ❤️????